BadMormon

So Now

I write.

I have this show I have to finish off. I have to figure out who to cast for parts that are pretty thankless supporting rolls. I’m wondering if it’s smart to try and write a solo show that contains other helpers in it.

I’m considering alternatives if every human being and situation going on melts down because that is what it feels like will probably happen. Not hard to simply turn things into pantomime i guess but maybe wood posts on wheels with cardboard cut outs? i can swirl them around the stage?

Tonight I surround myself with my comforts, my piggy little white clinging to middle class comforts of computers, video games, candy and drink. I look at my severe emotional issues that I keep grappling with, and which i assume are the residue of the human condition, and which a sardonic half-lip twist helps to mitigate, and know that it doesn’t matter. It will go into the script. I will eat it all day as I play pleasant for clients and son. I will find as much to laugh at as possible because there is nothing else.

I will work. So that when i finally can’t push myself anymore I may have enough to pay rent and rest.